numb

that numb feeling,
it's still here.
it's still the same.
hurting.
the way it is,
since the day,
i left you.

a.s. 0143hrs 011219

second

being a substitute
being the second option
hurts
you are happy and sad at the same time
happy that you are one of the choices
but sad cause you'll never be the first option
it's painful
and it'll remain
painful.

Perfect

That's definitely a wake up call.
That even you, being you, is perfect.
You don't even need to pretend to be someone else for other people to love you.
You do you.
So, keep being you.
- a.s.
160719, 0242hrs

Wrong

Liking you was wrong back then
So wrong
It was a huge mistake
And I'm really sorry for that
To you
And to her
I'm sorry your relationship didn't work out
I tried to escape
After realising that it was wrong
Years after
you guys were still happy together
But when it ended,
Stop looking for me
Stop looking at the past
You hurt me quite badly back then
And you,
are the main reason I'm scared
of being in a relationship
I'm scared the guy that i was going to be in love
Will become a guy like you too
- a.s.
20190124 0516hrs

who

So many stuff on my mind
Yet who would've listen to each of them
None,
None.
Do they even care
Do they even check on others
Or was it my own responsibility to announce it to others
That i am not okay
Not okay.
That i need help
That i need someone to listen to
Even if i said it out loud
did any of them showed up
Do they even bother
No.
Cause what's important in live,
Is our own story
And our own pain
- a.s.
20190124 0507hrs